What to do with her?

My  middle child causes me more concern than the other two combined at times.  She has a soft heart for some things and a hard, stubborn heart for others.  She'll cut her own nose off to spite her face.  Or, ruin her work in an effort to spite me, which of course as the adult we know perfectly well hurts only her.

The stomping. The temper.  The anger and frustration.  The stubbornness and defiance while silent is no less horrid than if it were screamed.  It's no less a "You can't make me!" than the words spoken out loud.

In the past month she lost every single toy and doll she had on her bed, and let me tell you, that was considerable.  She has earned back just two of those items despite having the opportunity to earn them ALL back by doing jobs.  She'd rather not.

I can see in her eyes hatred and can see the furious energy radiating from her.  I stand strong before her but inside feel a desperation.  How can I help this child?  I can not cave in, that does not help her, it would only feed the sin.  Would only confirm that what she is trying works.  But it doesn't work.  It hurts her, it cripples her from the person she could and can be.

I have a chart called Wise Words for Mom's by Ginger Plowman.  I find myself turning to it daily and reading the suggested questions and verses there.  Yesterday she wrote out and memorized two verses to help her resist lying.  Today it looks like it will be about Defiance and Laziness.  Because, in truth, that is what she is pulling today.  I can only hope that in the future these little battles will culminate in a Victory over the War and that her heart will belong fully to Christ.

It would be far easier to pack her off to school and not have to deal with this. To wash my hands and say it is the teacher's problem.  We would likely fight over homework but again I could wash my hands and say that I can only make her do so much.  It's true.  It's just as true here at home, except here at home, I love her.  A teacher wouldn't love the same way.

Just one more day in the life of a homeschool mom written in the basement and looking forward to sunshine in the future!